COMPLETE & FINISH

"People say there is no difference between COMPLETE & FINISH" ... But there is. When u marry the right one you are COMPLETE ....and when u marry the wrong one you are FINISHED.....And when the right one catches u with the wrong one you are COMPLETELY FINISHED" once said by a friend of mine.

There is nothing called happily married, is either you are MARRIED AND HAPPY, or MARRIED AND SAD, or thinking of either suicide or murder

In courtship everything is regarded as provisional and preliminary, and the smallest sample of virtue or accomplishment is taken to guarantee delightful stores which the broad leisure of marriage will reveal.
Rude awaking when at breakfast table you suddenly realise
I can’t stand that baldie sitting across the table never thought he would lose his hair,
I hate the noise coming from her chewing of the bone that should have been relegated to the Bin liner,
He snore nor she snore
i hate that, heavy gallop when she swallow her FuFu ball,
He or she has become an impediment in my life. or she has become criminally obese
Get over it people it’s our choice either you live with it and be condemned to everlasting unhappiness or bolt out of the door whichever way you are COMPLETELY FINISHED"

Thinking about it we are all set up from the start with this marriage shit, In most cases we find ourselves with self denials thinking everything will be alright when he or she moved in, but to find out it’s a case of MAN THAT HAD 7 CHILDREN BY SEVEN DIFFERENT WOMEN AND THEY ALL DIE AT CHILD BIRTH, COMMON THE GUY IS A TOUCH OF DEATH

A wise man with his own interpretation of the subject saying you made a very, very valid point regarding some couples staring at their marriage cert as if it has expiry date.
As I am typing this, my mind is on a friend who is like that. He always runs to me each time he wants to escape his wife. His attitude is just like you painted it.
Yet, I have lost count of people who simply hope and pray for their partners' demise because the home is too hot.
Now, let's get talking. How did the once upon a time rosy courtship become a sour grape? How did many couples landed in despair after enjoying years of courtship and one of the best honeymoon? How did they get into trouble?
Someone mentioned tolerance. I am tempted to agree but I won’t. This is because it is tolerance that made many sad couples endure years of marital disharmony. It is tolerance that killed their dreams of happy life!
Tolerance, can be classified into two:
1. Endurance...often negative. It involves one or both of the couples enduring the other, with the view that one day the problem may disappear. They are often unhappy about it. But the endure it. And once a while has to exchange blows and verbally assault to regain sanity.
2. Acceptance...often positive. Is when one or both party has agreed to live with other without complaining? He or she may not like it, but the spirit of togetherness and tolerance bind them together. It may be a cheating husband, being tolerated by the faithful wife, an over-sized wife, who spends all day fanning her fatty body and nagging at everyone being tolerated by a patience husband... I can go on and on.
Tolerance works only when there is a binding factor. When there is something that glues the couples for beta for worse. It may be wealth, children, religion, family and it maybe because the victim is too ugly or unlucky to find alternative.
However, it is often understood that our generation is lacking a basic knowledge of marital management. In fact, I suggest that a course be introduced for intending couples. This will save us a lot in term of money and social values.
The average youth marriage philosophy goes thus: Boy meets girl, they fall in love, fall in bed, get married, have kids and live happily there after!
We all know that it is not as simple as that. It is when they have kids that they begin to understand that marriage is not all about love, sex, and kids!

So what is the way out?
Some people put up and shut up and give their life into a miserable future in a marriage. This is not healthy for all who are connected with the marriage be it the couple, children and the external family. The ultimate problem lays in the couple who stick it out for all those years for the sake of the kids, money, time invested in each other, social, religious or family commitments, status or whatever their reason may be to hold that marriage together ignoring their own feelings for the external feelings and commitments. Then comes a time that we get all the freedom and the money we want to live comfortable but your heart is not comfortable because the dreams, goals and senses are lost and there is no vision for tomorrow.

Inspired by Gbemisola Adesida

Life is a gift Celebrate it...

Today before you think of saying an unkind word
Think of someone who can't speak

Before you complain about the taste of your food
Think of someone who has nothing to eat

Before you complain about your husband or wife
Think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion

Today before you complain about life
Think of someone who went too early to heaven

Before you complain about your children
Think of someone who desires children but they're barren

Before you argue about your dirty house; someone didn't clean or sweep
Think of the people who are living in the streets

Before whining about the distance you drive
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet

And when you are tired and complain about your job
Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another
Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down
Put a smile on your face and thank God you're alive and still around

Life is a gift

Live it...

Enjoy it...

Celebrate it...

And fulfill it

Just Laugh it off!

Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.

He shoots his friend to death.

Wife says "If you continue to behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends".

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Small Boy wrote to Father Christmas," send me a brother"

Father Christmas wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"

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What is the definition of Mistress?

Someone between the Mister and Mattress

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Husband asks, "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??

"Without Information, Fighting every time"

Wife replies," No, It means,

"With Idiot For Ever!!!"

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Three Feelings:

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?

Stress is when wife is pregnant,

Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant and

Panic is when both are pregnant.

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Teacher: Do you know the importance of period?

Kid: Yes, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got

Heart attack & our driver ran away.

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Some women asked a man who was travelling with six children, are all these kids yours??

Man replies; No, I work in a condom factory & these are customer complaints.

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Two men met while both where looking for their lost wives.

1st: What does yours look like?

2nd: She is 5"7, 36-24-36, Fair, Black eyes. What about yours?

1st: Forget mine. Let's find yours!!

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A Son asks the difference between confidence and confidential.

Dad says, you are my son, I'm confident. Your friend is also my son, that's

Confidential!

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Mother to her teenage daughter: I think this is the right time we should

Talk about sex.

Daughter (Excitingly): Sure mom! Tell me, what you want to know.

Mother Faints...

Modern Day Wife

These are the type of women we should be marrying... .Modern women - so says the men? It is a myth that when a son gets married and a new daughter-in-law arrives in the family, everything changes. Some daughters-in-law are well trained and well mannered.... They don't come to change the family, they are here to... (READ ON!) The new wife was being welcomed at the Husband's home in a traditional manner. As expected she gave a speech; "My dear family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family, firstly, my being here does not mean that I would want to change your way of life, your routine ."No, I will never do that, never in a million years." "What do you mean my child?" asked the father-in-law. "What I mean dad is (looking at her in-laws); Those who used to wash the dishes must carry on washing them. Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it. Those who cooked should not stop at my account, AND Those who used to clean should continue cleaning!!! "And what are you here for?" enquired the mother-in-law. "AS FOR ME, I'M HERE JUST TO ENTERTAIN YOUR SON! COMMON HONEY LETS GROOVE!!"

What is the name of your Church

Change

Don't be absolute about yourself being so clever, beautiful and powerful, l when you might simply be surrounded by stupid, ugly and weak people.
But be absolute about yourself being so lucky and blessed, because you are surrounded by life to fill your days with, people to cast love upon, dreams to bear hope for and miracles to give your name to.

When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn't mean they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over

Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."

When we are confronted with unpleasant feelings and the necessity to change, we may fall back on our deepest instinct – we fight. Whether the problem is to move on after a relationship ends, we cannot change as long as we struggle.

Change is frightening. The past may have been miserable, but at least it was familiar. We become comfortable with old habits and thought patterns which keep us from growing. Our negative thoughts can snowball and, at times consume us.
Negative thinking separates us from a sense of belonging, suffocates our hope and prevents us from gaining true happiness. Negativity has been a part of our lives for so many years; we need a great deal of practice to develop positive views.

If we pause in the midst of our struggles and worries, we can give ourselves time to let a new realisation sink in; we don’t have to fight anymore. We have another choice: we can surrender. Rather than manipulating situations, we can surrender control. Surrender is essentially an act of trust. When we let go, we can trust events to unfold on their own. Trust gives us a sense of acceptance, and through acceptance we find serenity.
Paradoxically, surrender is not the same as giving up. Surrender means exchanging “me” for “we”; letting go.

It's the worst feeling in the world to love & hate someone all at the same time. And it's hard to watch things change when all you want is for them to stay the same. It's funny
but stupid how you want everything & nothing at the same time. It's crazy when you want to let go, but you keep holding on, & when you want to move on but you're stuck right where you started.
When feelings come and go & you can't decide what you want. When you have so many things to say but you don't know where to start. When you want them in your life so bad, but all you can do is push them farther & farther away. It's so hard to think
back to how things used to be & look at it now and realize that things are different & they may never be the same.
You tell yourself it's not worth it, but if it really didn't matter, you wouldn't spend so much time thinking about it.
Funny how just when you think life can't possibly get any worse it suddenly does.
But when u say life can't get any better it doesn't

So God agreed

On the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten." 
So God agreed. 

On the second day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks and make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?"
And God agreed. 

On the third day God created the cow. "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves, and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." 
And God agreed again. 

On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years? Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back, and the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?" 

Okay," said God, "You've got a deal." 

So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. 

Life has now been explained to you.